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The Survey! - A simple story to understand misunderstanding in love and relationships.

Everyone is intelligent but the problem is they think that only they're the superior than the rest! - Yagnesh 

Everyone has their own way of interpreting the world around them. Some people prioritize relationships, whereas some people prioritize something else and so on! And, interesting fact is that everyone has their own philosophy to explain their interpretation logically and accurately!

If you spend three days with a puppy, you will definitely fall in love with the puppy! - Hemantsinh Rao 

There are many ways to convince people by winning their trust in many ways but I always choose 'straightforwardness' because, it helps me save my time & instantly reveals the value of a decision. - Yagnesh

I want to share a beautiful psychology related story of love that will teach you so many perspectives of life that everyone must understand if they want to have a successful relationship in their life.

I don't mean to hurt anyone's feelings by writing this post. I just want to show you one perspective of thinking that may help you in your personal life.

The fact is: If you are saying that you have been in love with someone and only that person is your "true love", you will never prefer anyone over that guy/girl. 

But, "if you have chosen someone else, that simply means you never loved that previous person or you just have compromised with your future self". -- This understanding of love is not the right one. Because, you are limiting the definition of love. 

"Love is not limited, it can happen anytime, anywhere with anyone and any numbers of time". You live several lives in several age range! For example you have experienced childhood from age 3 to 12. 

Let me breakdown it for you:

• Childhood: 6 to 12 years old

• Adolescence: 13 to 19 years old

• Early Adulthood: 20 to 35 years 

• Old middle Adulthood: 36 to 60 years

• Old late Adulthood: 61 years old and above.

And in each of these age range, your understanding is different than the previous. As you grow, your understanding of life may become stronger and knowledgeful or decreased (based on your own way of understanding the life). That's the reason you can have many different love in your life. Love is eternal. If you are seeing it as a just affection or attraction, it is your material thinking but not spiritual. 

You have misunderstood the definition of love. You have control over all your thoughts, beliefs, emotions and mind. If you choose a person to hate, you can. If you choose a person to love, you can. There is neither objections nor any restrictions, because everything can be controlled by your mind if you have a mastery over it. 

I have seen many people who hates that person whom they loved so badly! 

Why your break up instantly made that person bad? 

Selecting your life partner is a very critical and most important thing in your life. 

The man or woman you choose to be your partner affects everything in your life: your mental health, your peace of mind, the love inside of you, your happiness, how you get through tragedies, your success, how your children will be raised and so much more. So, choose wisely. - Internet.

If your partner is not able to understand all your perspectives of thinking, you both will hate each other at some point of time. But your understanding will ignore those misunderstanding and you will save your relationship by keeping your ego aside. 

Your partner and you both must understand each other's way of thinking, priorities, goals, freedom, expectations, relationships and so on. 

Why do you need to do this much effort? Because, you both are separate physically. Even though you believe that you both are equal in terms of spiritual philosophy, you both are separate physically. No matter what, this is the fact you have to accept. That is the reason why you both must understand & respect each other's dignity. 


Let me tell you a story: 

One day Yash proposed to a girl of his choice. He just directly proposed that girl asking "will you marry me!?". 

Yash liked many girls in the past but he never dared to tell any of them. And when he tried to propose to a few girls of his choice, he got rejections every time because he was a "very nice person" and, he did not know "how to propose in a right way!!!". 

Before you judge a person, you must know about his character, thinking ability and beliefs. Here in our story, Yash was a very nice person. He was readily attracted towards beautiful girls because he had been in search of one who can be his lifelong partner. 

Honestly speaking, almost all girls always like boys who act as "fully confident, rich, responsible, caring, lovely" but they will never realize that they are just "acting", they will never like a "gentleman" who respects them and their dignity. 

No doubt they are the ones who may not be able to act as fully confident but they will do anything for the person they love. And, many girls never realize these things. They just get trapped in the "what they see is true". 

If I flirt with an unknown girl speaking "ohh wow, you're looking so gorgeous today!" -- she will be happy without knowing my intentions. She would approach me and try to talk with me because I'd spoken words she would always love to hear. All boys know this fact and some use it for bad purposes but, there are some gentlemen who respect girls' dignity. 

Anyways, coming back to the story, Yash proposed to a girl of his choice and she rejected yash because she was loving someone else. Yash accepted the rejection because he knew that he should respect her decision. But she broke the relationship with him. When he got to know that she is upset with the action that he had taken, he tried to save the relationship by saying "it was just a survey". She ignored him and never tried to talk with him afterwards. 

A few months later, Yash got to know that just after that incident, she laughed a lot thinking "he was a very stupid guy and did not even know that anyone can understand that he was just trying to fool her and cover his mistakes by explaining about that rubbish 'survey'". But she did not even think the other side of the coin. She did not think, "why he was trying to make himself look like a fool?" He was just trying to save the relationship between them. He already knew that whatever he was trying to do (explaining about the survey) would look like he is a stupid guy and she would laugh on him, but as time will pass, she will forget it and accept him as a friend again. With this mentality, he kept messaging her occasionally asking 'if she is okay?' but she never replied in the way he was expecting. So, he understood that she has broken the relationship and it will not be heald by any means. Therefore, he just left to send a single message to her waiting for her message. -- and here, the story ends. 


I know that the story is not that much interesting, isn't it? 😅 But, I am definitely sure that it teaches you many things; 

  • Suppose, If your friend proposes to you, there must be a reason. Reason could be so many like 'your honesty, your long term friendship, your understanding of him, your character, your own way of living the life and so on!'. But you judged him by thinking 'he has no love for me because he has been doing such things with many girls from the past' and because of that thinking, you might have considered him as imaginary womanizer and that was why disliked him. 

  • I have seen people who remains same entire life and they are the ones who never grow in their life. But it's not the fact, there are some people who changes themselves over time based on experiences. Before you make a decision for someone, you need to understand what is the truth. 

  • If you see the world based on other's telling, you are the world's most stupid person. 

  • Love is eternal. If you think someone cannot love more than one person, you are wrong. Love can happen anytime with anyone and any number of times. But it is in your hand to control your emotions. For example, if you are committed to love a particular person, you can ignore or you can choose to ignore the love feelings for someone else. If you accept it or not, it is the fact that you will have to accept one day! 

  • People have different meaning of marriage and love. If I am going to say to a girl of my choice that I want to marry you, she will definitely think that I want a physical relationship with her and that's why I am offering marriage proposal. But it is not the truth. You must understand the other person's intentions before you judge them and make a decision. Because, physical relationship is only possible by the agreement of both people, whereas marriage is not limited to only 'being physical'. Marriage is a commitment of love. If you marry a girl of your choice, you comiit to God and your souls that you both will never be apart no matter what. You both are now one. You both will love each other only. 

  • Marriage may mean differently in literature, but I would also like to give you a new definition of marriage today: marriage is a commitment between two love birds that they will love each other no matter what! They will spend their entire life with each other, they are not separate now, they both are one now. 

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